Good morning and happy Saturday to you! D’you know, I only discovered yesterday that this is another bank holiday weekend. Thank goodness those poor, tired bankers are having a well-earned rest from the arduous task of stealing our money.
As you can see, I’ve just made a mass-judgement about bankers based on the global financial crisis, and although that’s not exactly a controversial opinion, I’m sure that there are nice, compassionate people among the financiers of Canary Wharf. (Don’t look at me like that. It could happen.)
What makes you judge someone? Do you assume that someone is trendy (and therefore a bad person) because they’re sporting a beard and skinny jeans? Do you dub someone a saint in your mind because you witness them buying a Big Issue? Do you lose respect for a friend when you discover that they enjoy the musical stylings of Justin Bieber?
I do, and if you’re honest I think you do, too. Don’t worry, this isn’t going to be a preachy post about how we need to be less judgemental (although I think we should probably give it a go, shouldn’t we? Yeah, alright. I will if you will). Instead, I would like to identify a few things that we absolutely should judge people based on:
1) How they talk about their elders
Even if someone doesn’t have the best relationship in the world with their biological parents, everyone has parental figures in their lives from whom they have learned a great deal. The way that someone talks about their mum, older sibling, grandparent, favourite teacher etc. tells you a lot about what made them who they are, and how big a part of their personality is informed by a sense of respect.
2) Sense of humour
Don’t be misled here: I don’t mean that you should judge people based on which sitcoms they like, or whether they’re fans of the Cornetto Trilogy. By “sense of humour” I mean how they respond to day-to-day life: do they laugh when they fall over in public, or throw a hissy fit? Do they snigger at others’ misfortune, or are they sympathetic? A person’s sense of humour demonstrates very clearly what their priorities are and how much perspective they have.
3) Social standing
Again, don’t get the wrong idea: I’m not suggesting that we split the world into Breakfast Club characters. What I mean is, you can tell a lot about someone by how their friends behave around them. For example, my brother is the dad figure in his friendship group at uni. This amuses me because I know him well enough (obviously) to know that how his friends see him accurately reflects his personality.
4) How (much) they feel about stuff
Obviously we can’t have an opinion about everything, but you can make fairly accurate assumptions about someone based on how much they care about their interests, ambitions and morals. It doesn’t really matter what the interests are (within the limits of morality and the law, of course) as long as the person cares about them. Apathy is the enemy of romance, art, the progress of science and half-decent conversation.
5) How they feel about you
For your own sake, you should definitely make judgements based on how someone treats you, and how they feel about you. Someone who loves you (and acts like it) is clearly an excellent human being, and someone who does not is not worth your time. Also, who wouldn’t love you? You’re adorable!
Have a lovely, relaxing Saturday. Maybe go for a long walk.